Friday, May 25, 2012

Submission

No, not that kind of submission! Though this kind is fun in its own way.

I emailed my novella, "Wilder" to Harlequin Nocturne Cravings today. I re-read it about a thousand times, tweaked it, polished it till it shone. And then I hit "send."

It was, honestly, the scariest thing I've done in a long time.

When I hit "send" on the non-fiction work I do, there really isn't anything scary about it. I know. I've done my research, I've followed the guidelines, and I've presented the information my editor wanted. Job well done, time to celebrate with chocolate and coffee.

But this? This is something different. The only similarity is that I sent my best work, just as I would with my "day" job. But there is no sense of "whew. That's done. I rock!" There is the constant wondering: did I go into enough detail about this? Did I repeat myself? Am I going to bore the pants off of the editor who reads it? (God, I hope not!)

Is it good enough?

And that, that right there, is the scariest question of all. Is this, the best I can do at this point in my career, good enough?

All I can do is get back to work on the novel revisions, start the next novella, and try not to obsess. As of today, at least for the next few weeks or so, it is out of my hands.

Deep breaths. Where is the chocolate when I need it?!

2 comments:

  1. I'm right there with you, Amelia. What's worse is that you feel - how can I put this? - left behind. Like you've just sent your kids off to some place where they're going to be judged and you can't be there to defend them. I know my story is good, I know I can write but it's still scary. Before digital, you had only a query to sell it - this time, my baby went with it so my hope is that they read it, get hooked, love it and then we go from there. Scared shitless!!
    Best of luck to you, kiddo, I'm sending up prayers for you 'cuz I know not to ask for me. *wink*

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  2. Yes! "Left behind" is a good part of what I'm feeling. I love those characters, I loved their story, and now it is totally out of my hands. Aargh. Good luck, and I'm sending up prayers for you, too :-)

    (And thanks for stopping by!)

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